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如何坚定且礼貌的拒绝别人?(双语)

1 7489 分享 来源:必克英语 2018-07-05
        时间永远不够用,事情永远做不完。事情总会越来越多,当然有一些不是分内之事。

这些请求可以大致分为三类:

1、与我有关责无旁贷的;

2、虽然与我有关,但是请求的内容不合时宜或不和情理;

3、没有义务给予承诺的请求。


How to refuse others firmly and politely?
如何坚定且礼貌的拒绝别人呢?

Step 1: Listening.
第一步:倾听

It’s not simply hearing what the other person is saying. You have to literally stop what you’re doing, and carefully listen through what they say.

不是让你单纯听见对方讲什么,而是真的停下你手上的事,然后认真听对方把事情说完。

The point is to let the other person see that you are willing to help, and let them understand that you already know their needs.

重点是让对方看得出你愿意帮忙,并且让对方明白你已经知道了他们的需求。

In this way, even if you eventually refuse them, they will understand that you are not available, instead of not willing to help.

这样一来,即使你最终拒绝了对方,他们也会知道你是真的没时间,而不是单纯地不想帮忙。

Step 2: Start with Conclusion when Refusing
第二步:拒绝的时候先说结论

We all hope that other people will come to a conclusion quickly, but when we speak, we instinctively start from the beginning of the story.

我们都希望别人快点说结论,但自己讲话的时候却总是本能地从头说起。

This way of speaking is not good for communication, because the other person usually does not have so much patience to hear you finish your speaking, and by the time you come to the conclusion, their attention has long gone.

这样的说话方式是非常不利于沟通的,因为对方通常没有那么多耐心听你讲完,当你说到结论的时候,他们的注意力早就消散了。

If you want to refuse somebody, just tell them NO, and then explain the reasons why.

如果你要拒绝对方,就先直接告诉对方不行,然后再讲为什么不行。

Step 3: Provide an Alternative Solution
第三步:提供备用方案

In situations like this, don’t just tell the other person that you don’t have the time. Instead, you should give them a time when you would be available. For example, you may say “Sorry, I really don’t have the time right now. I have to get off work on time. Is it OK if we talk tomorrow morning?"

这个时候不要劈头盖脸地告诉对方你没时间,而是向对方提供一个可行的时间,例如:“抱歉,我现在真的没时间,等下必须准时下班,明早OK吗?”

In addition, if you have finished listening to the other person’s needs and finally choose to refuse him, you can also recommend him a person whom you feel can help him.

另外,如果你已经听完了对方的需求,而最终选择拒绝他,也可以向他推荐一个你觉得可以帮到他的人。

In this way, although you refused him, he still can feel your support.

这样一来,虽然你拒绝了对方,但依旧让他们感受到了你的支持

In a word, refusal is inevitable, but the way of refusal is optional.

总而言之,拒绝是不可避免的,而拒绝的方式是可以选择的。

An inappropriate refusal may cause great harm to your working life.

一次唐突的拒绝可能会给你的职场生活带来很大的伤害。

An artistic refusal, on the other hand, may lead you to some unexpected benefits.

而一次艺术性的拒绝则能帮你获得很多意想不到的好处。

有趣的人都在看:

【冷知识】最古老、最短、最常用的单词是?

职场英语口语——Ask for leave请假

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